Monday, June 06, 2005

Openmindedness

In shiur today I was listening to my Rabbi explain the Tosfos and I just wasn't getting it. The logic kept hitting a stumbling block in my head. I lowered my horns and charged at his words spitting out words of fire. Again and again he kept throwing words in my face. My mind was on road rage mode. I DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!! He is wrong and I am right. WHat he is saying makes no sense whatsoever. This can't be pshat. I know what I am reading. I know how to translate words. I know the halachah. I know right from wrong. In the midst of all this, my Rebbi did not get angry he held his ground. he did not give in to my claims. He paried expertly to my feeble thrust at over powering his undertsanding of the Talmud. Unrelentingly he "hunted" me down, while I was getting weaker and weaker until I just gave in. The kerel of truth shown bright. My stubborness to hold my ground and my opinion was overclouding my judgement to make a correct and logical decision. My pride would not allow me to admit he was right and I was wrong. I did not want to listen to reason. I was being "argumentative" (as he says in his words). I emotionally could not accept what he was saying. I am realizing that I do not enjoy being open mided to new ideas because I am too lazy to think and accept and to change my thought patterns. Lesson well learnt.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

It looks like you accomplished the 1st step which is to admit your problem with pride and give his view consideration. hatzlacha

7:14 PM  
Blogger EN said...

Anon-What is the second?

6:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

excellent post

7:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

1. admitting your problem

2. Working on it, being open to diff. viewpoints.

3:57 AM  

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